What Is Vipassana Meditation 101: A Vow of Silence

Source: Jacob Wackerhausen / Getty

Back in late 2013 two things happened to me: My psychic abilities kicked in full speed and I decided to ditch living in Brooklyn, NYC and go roving the streets of Southeast Asia. At the time I didn’t feel that these two events were related but today, I could totally see how they are because once our consciousness expands, we often need drastic changes in our immediate environment from the physical to the emotional to the people we know in order to facilitate rapid growth and healing within ourselves.

On January 11th, 2014 I flew out of JFK headed for Hanoi, Vietnam in what would be the most life changing series of events.

I experienced many things while living throughout Southeast Asia which for me included stays in Thailand, Vietnam, Bali, Malaysia and Cambodia. Sitting with monks, studying with Shamans, swimming in turquoise oceans surrounded by volcanic rocks and some of the most outrageous and tasty food on the planet. But it was attempting to do 10 days of silence secluded in the foothills of Northern Thailand that had one of the deepest impacts on me as both a beginner intuitive and as a human being.

While living in Southeast Asia was amazing, my income at the time was up and down as a freelance writer and I was grieving both the back-to-back deaths of my grandmother and my best friend from the previous year all while learning to navigate and integrate newly uncovered intuitive gifts. Whew!

As I was researching ways to save money, possibly heal deep seated grief (did I mention staying at the retreat was free!?), and get deeper into a meditation practice so that one could get in touch with God/the Universe/Source, I discovered Vipassana Meditation Retreats.

Vipassana Meditation Retreats is a 10 day traditional Buddhist practice aimed at cultivating a deep understanding of the nature of reality. The word “Vipassana” means “clear seeing” or “insight,” and the practice focuses on developing mindfulness and insight into the impermanent, unsatisfactory, and non-self nature of all phenomena.

During this practice, you literally sit in silence all day long while focusing on your breath so that you can focus on your bodily sensations, your mind thoughts, learn to cultivate concentration, and also start to understand what programming is running within you subconsciously.

Your inner voice gets LOUD!

The goal is mental clarity, enhanced spiritual growth, getting in touch with your higher self, deepening your connection with God/Source, and enhancing your ability to concentrate, breaking from all distractions and learning how to be alone with self without overly relying on others for comfort, entertainment, or validation.

Did I mention you do this all in silence? All. Day. Long.

At the time, though I had never done this, I didn’t really have a strong meditation practice and enjoyed talking like it was a sport. I thought to myself that this was something I needed. So off I went to the Dhamma Kancan meditation center right in the heart of Kanchanaburi, Thailand, about 6 hours north of Bangkok, Thailand where I was living. Upon entering the vast open temple I was greeted by the scent of incense, monks in golden flowing robes, and trees in every direction. I didn’t see any fellow students in meditation; instead, I saw humans of all backgrounds sweeping, cleaning, and milling about all isolated in their vow of silence. It was at once extremely peaceful and slightly scary.

I was quickly ushered into a small open air office by the manager who gave me the rundown: Prayers at 5 a.m. followed by breakfast at 7 a.m., and a 90 minute break before spending the rest of the day in and out of meditation until lunch at 1 p.m. and sleep at 8 p.m.. All this while swiping my phone and my laptop and giving me two cotton outfits that were both off-white. A white, cotton, roomy top and bottom matching set that was all I was to wear while there and if I was on my cycle I could switch out for a pair of maroon pants.

I can’t lie, when he took my phone I had a moment of panic even though I knew that was the deal when I signed up. After I was informed of all of the house rules and was told that I could leave whenever I wanted, I was taken to my room for the 10 days – a small, all wood room with a single tiny bed with a thin sheet and thinner pillow. There was a small lamp, a beautifully wide window, and that was all. I was to share a bathroom with four other girls in the small house where we each had our own room that did lock for our safety. Since I arrived after, lunch I was given a banana, some papaya, and told to meet them for the 3 p.m. meditation.

Since this spiritual personal essay could go hella long, I’ll speed it up and give you the highlights, starting with, I didn’t last even a full 72 hours, much less 10 days.

I know, I know. But y’all, the not talking and having to sit silently with my thoughts all while trying to sleep on a hard bed every night just got to me. Plus those 5 a.m. meditations were not it…

At that time, not only was I was trying to heal from grief, my usual coping mechanism of overeating and distracting myself with social media wasn’t available. Plus, I wasn’t vegan and that was all that was available with only three light meals a day (simple lentil soups, a bit of bread or fruit) and no snacks.

It was hard – getting up daily at 4 a.m. to meditate on a bare concrete floor for an hour at 5 a.m. where we couldn’t move was unbearable. My hips hurt, my nose itched, and my back ached yet we weren’t allowed to move to relieve ourselves. For some reason, all that kept running through my mind was BET videos from the 90s and my grandmother’s cooking. I didn’t realize that I was really missing her (and possibly wanted to be relieved of adult responsibilities) – I just thought I was having some sort of teen nostalgia. By the third day I had had enough.

Before I left, they asked me to sweep the grounds for an hour or so which would give me time to receive downloaded messages from God and be a parting thank you to the center for hosting me and my failure. While I wanted to shrug this off and just leave, out of respect, I did as requested and y’all I was finally able to hear so clearly from God!

It was insane!

As I started to sweep the heavy red dust from the walkway with the sun beaming down on my afro, I received so many messages about the grief I was going through and how to process it better without overeating. I even got insight as to why I was chosen to have such strong intuitive gifts and how the death of my grandmother and best friend helped to open up my gifts. It was amazing and I’m sure many of you were like “girl, so did you stay?!” And sadly no, I didn’t.

To be honest, as I gathered my things and walked to the front gate to wait for their small bus to take me to the regional train station and with wind chimes singing behind me, I felt that I had gotten what I came for. Three days was enough for me and after that experience, I did improve my spiritual abilities and soon after was able to channel angels and the deceased loved ones of others. I also never went back to overeating as I had before, though I still dealt with weight and food issues, but my heart was lightened up just a tiny bit afterwards. That was way more than I was even expecting, so a win is a win, right?!

Although I did feel guilt and a bit of shame around not finishing the entire 10 days, I was proud of myself for trying and my relationship with God and myself was forever changed and empowered.

Tell me in the comments below…would you ever try this method to get closer to God?

Peace and light. -ZYA

ZYA is a spiritual teacher and psychic medium who channels messages from the divine through words, sound and visual art. Currently based in Mexico City, you can book a reading with her at BOOKZYA.com and follow her on IG at PSYCHICZYA.

MORE FROM ZYA: 

Yoga Nidra: Sleeping Yoga That You Didn’t Know You Needed

20 Years of Pluto In Aquarius: 20 Global Predictions

Chakras: What Are They, Why Are They Important, & 7 Ways To Activate Them

What Is Vipassana Meditation: A Vow of Silence  was originally published on elev8.com